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Joke!
- Thread starter 4EVER17
- Start date
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1. "Your knowledge and input is always welcome but please respect the team, the drivers and other members. Abuse or harsh criticisms will not be tolerated".
2. "This forum is designated 'Family Friendly' - (ie. we have young & impressionable readers - even if they're not Members/Posters) - therefore language must be moderated! - (how would YOU feel about YOUR 9 year old reading it?)
3. "Use of characters (eg. #$*@!) that only 'partially' disguise an intended vulgar/offensive word(s) is unacceptable!
If you MUST express yourself in such a manner... use ***** and let the reader's imagination 'fill in the blanks'."
Thank you for your cooperation.
That'd be funny if it wasn't an impossible dream...
bjr22n
New member
Hardies Hero
New member
you heard the long range weather forecast?
apparently there wont be a storm for a long long time.
apparently there wont be a storm for a long long time.
What? So you're keeping the G-string?
Hardies Hero
New member
ill pay that [bw]
Five Surgeons
The first surgeon says, 'I like to see Accountants on my operating table because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered.'
The second responds, 'Yeah, but you should try Electricians! Everything inside them is colour-coded.'
The third surgeon says, 'No, I really think Librarians are the best; everything inside them is in alphabetical order.'
The fourth surgeon chimes in, 'You know I like Construction Workers. Those guys always understand when you have a few parts left over at the end, and when the job takes longer than you said it would.'
But the fifth surgeon shut them all up when he observed, 'You're all wrong. Politicians are the easiest to operate on. There's no guts, no heart, no balls, no brains, and no spine, and there are only two moving parts - the mouth and the arsehole - and they are interchangeable'.
[crackup][crackup]
.
Five surgeons are discussing who were the best patients to operate on.
The first surgeon says, 'I like to see Accountants on my operating table because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered.'
The second responds, 'Yeah, but you should try Electricians! Everything inside them is colour-coded.'
The third surgeon says, 'No, I really think Librarians are the best; everything inside them is in alphabetical order.'
The fourth surgeon chimes in, 'You know I like Construction Workers. Those guys always understand when you have a few parts left over at the end, and when the job takes longer than you said it would.'
But the fifth surgeon shut them all up when he observed, 'You're all wrong. Politicians are the easiest to operate on. There's no guts, no heart, no balls, no brains, and no spine, and there are only two moving parts - the mouth and the arsehole - and they are interchangeable'.
[crackup][crackup]
Poached
Happy Ending To Abuse Case
Federal Court Ruling
A seven year old boy was at the centre of a courtroom drama yesterday when he challenged a court ruling over who should have custody of him. The boy has a history of being beaten by his parents and the judge initially awarded custody to his aunt, in keeping with the child custody law and regulations requiring that family unity be maintained to the degree possible. The boy surprised the court when he proclaimed that his aunt beat him more than his parents and he adamantly refused to live with her. When the judge suggested that he live with his grandparents, the boy cried out that they also beat him. After considering the remainder of the immediate family and learning that domestic violence was apparently a way of life among them, the judge took the unprecedented step of allowing the boy to propose who should have custody of him. After two recesses to check legal references and confer with child welfare officials, the judge granted temporary custody to the New South Wales State of Origin Team, whom the boy firmly believes are not capable of beating anyone.[f][ak][bw]
Happy Ending To Abuse Case
Federal Court Ruling
A seven year old boy was at the centre of a courtroom drama yesterday when he challenged a court ruling over who should have custody of him. The boy has a history of being beaten by his parents and the judge initially awarded custody to his aunt, in keeping with the child custody law and regulations requiring that family unity be maintained to the degree possible. The boy surprised the court when he proclaimed that his aunt beat him more than his parents and he adamantly refused to live with her. When the judge suggested that he live with his grandparents, the boy cried out that they also beat him. After considering the remainder of the immediate family and learning that domestic violence was apparently a way of life among them, the judge took the unprecedented step of allowing the boy to propose who should have custody of him. After two recesses to check legal references and confer with child welfare officials, the judge granted temporary custody to the New South Wales State of Origin Team, whom the boy firmly believes are not capable of beating anyone.[f][ak][bw]